Caden is one month old

Holy cow, how did this month go by? I swear it was just yesterday I brought home my sweet, jaundiced, tired little baby and was completely overwhelmed and second guessing my every move.

I still feel like a newb, but am slowly starting to get to know his needs and little personality. For instance:

He likes to wake up real slow in the mornings. He'll grunt the hours away in his cradle, but around 6:30 he'd like to eat a little and be patted to sleep on your chest. Then at 7:30 he wants to eat a little more, and then he'll sleep for another hour or two. Mostly he just wants to snuggle. And that's totally okay.

A binky is not a suitable substitute for a boob.

He doesn't sleep well with his arms swaddled at night. He wants them up near his head, so we just swaddle the rest of him.

Chances are, if he's just woken up and you try to change him, a projectile liquid from one or more orifices is just waiting to cover you *and* him. It's best to give him a couple minutes to wake up fully.

He does best with tummy time about an hour after he's eaten.

He coos at night when he nurses.

He sneezes just like his dad - 5-7 times in a row.

He's a grunter.


Mom Moments:

1) His circumcision was the most awful, awful, awful. I could hear him screaming from the waiting room. When I was finally allowed to go get him, he looked up at me with the saddest, most betrayed face. I will never forget that look and oh, it hurt my heart.

2) I took him to the doctor because I was convinced they messed up on his circ. Turns out they didn't.

3) He peed right into my eyeball one night.

4) My favorite thing EVER is how he looks up and just stares into my eyes when he nurses. I swear I can see right into his soul and it's the sweetest, most innocent, most genuine little soul ever.

5) I'll be honest and admit that I didn't feel an immediate bond with him after he was born. I went right into hyper-aware, am I doing any of this right? mode, but by week one I tell you my heart could just burst.

Now, before the photo dump, let me just tell you I don't have adequate words to describe what being a mom has done to me. I adore everything about my little baby Cade and can't imagine my life without him. I'm exhausted, my house is not nearly as clean as it was a month ago, and I haven't bothered to put on makeup today, but I love, love, love being his mom. I feel like it's my calling.

Already, thoughts of  "when can we have another one? will we have to do IVF? How many times can we do this?" have started filling my head and heart. I can't imagine doing this just once and I feel an assurance that we'll get to do it again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

One week old and adorable as can be.

 

 

3 weeks old