Stimming makes you Fat.

I'm 100% sure that over the 1-2 weeks I will have been stimming I will have added weight. I am 2 things, most frequently at the same time: a stress eater, and a stress exerciser. 

Know what's funny about IVF? You only get to be an eater.

Actually, at the class, the nurse said - "Good news - you don't have to be sedentary! A light walk and some yoga is fine."

What is yoga? Why do people do yoga? Yoga does not "relax" me. Well maybe it does. The class I went to a few times was pretty great but I'm not disciplined or experienced enough to do it solo. The whole time I awkwardly flail and stretch my limbs out in weird directions and just wonder inwardly, "Does this look right? Would the namaste lady move my right elbow here? Huh. Does it feel good? No - I think that means I'm doing it right - yoga isn't supposed to feel good right?"

This is why I can't do yoga.

When I'm stressed, I want to go run. Outside. With loud music. For about an hour. That's what I like.

BUT double whammy.

1) My ovaries are getting GIANT. Like I can feel them twinging when I sit. I can feel them twingy when I stand. I can feel them twingy when I walk. The really fun part is when I remind myself we're only about 1 week into a 2 week stim cycle and then I feel my blood pressure go up a teensy because twingy turns into please-don't-make-me-walk-they're-going-to-fall-out.
2) February in Utah means inversion and quite literally the worst air quality in the nation. I promise I'm not fabricating this, just look it up. All this to say that you can not go outside unless you want to die of black lung. I will be staying inside and NOT going for "light walks" until the inversion decides to lift.

Back to my original point - stimming makes you fat.

Besides bloating from the medication which is SUPER real and SUPER uncomfortable (thanks Jeff for the cute yoga pants because I will be living in this for the next two weeks because NONE of my jeans can button) I am semi stressed and hungry but full at the same time. Nothing tastes good except chocolate (if either of my sister in laws are reading this I am 100% off the no sweets bandwagon).

So I'm eating chocolate. I have this cute mental game where I can convince myself if I do a bunch of squats and stuff it will somehow cancel out all of the food I'm eating (because oh yeah remember I CAN'T EXERCISE).

Why no exercise, you ask? Ovarian torsion. Ovarian torsion occurs when your giant baseball ovaries twist and explode because they are giant and you moved to fast.

So I'll just be over here stuffing my sedentary (except for squatting because duh) face and getting fat.